A PENSIONER attacked a chaplain and launched a foul-mouthed rant in front of dozens of children at a cathedral in a row over its crazy golf course.
Michael Feeney, 67, raged: “This is not f****** Disneyland, it’s a f****** cathedral. This is a f****** disgrace.”


Feeney was spotted sitting outside Rochester Cathedral in Kent with his dog.
Visiting chaplain Margaret Moore was worried about him but when she offered help he grabbed her lightly by the throat.
Feeney, from Rochester, returned an hour later smelling of alcohol, went inside and launched his tirade. He confronted verger Joseph Miller and “tried to strike” him, Medway magistrates heard.
When police arrived to arrest him, he told them: “I was in the cathedral and they were playing mini golf. That’s just not right.”
‘THIS IS A F****** DISGRACE’
Visitor numbers have doubled since the temporary nine-hole course was installed in the nave.
But yesterday Feeney’s lawyer Ghulam Humayun said his client told him: “This is a place of worship and they are turning it into a leisure centre.
“He said a number of French tourists were talking about a game of golf.
“He said they were almost mocking us. This does not go on in other European churches.” Feeney told the JPs: “I am extremely sorry.
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“I am extremely ashamed about it. It’s a one-off thing. I try to be a nice person to everybody and I am sorry about that.”
He admitted engaging in indecent behaviour in a church and common assault.
He was given a 12-month conditional discharge and ordered to pay £85 costs and a £21 victim surcharge.

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